My eyes grow tired of seeing
and sometimes I miss believing in this,
but I best not deceive myself again.
I am a wave, an oscillation,
a series of semi-circles
strung out in space and time.
I live a year of seasons
in a decade and a day.
Come on,
cut through me.
Take my soul and
turn it into science.
Display who I am
in diagram
and cold calculation.
It's what I do to myself.
I hate it for how good it feels
when I know that it's not real.
My dreams keep changing.
My heart keeps getting rearranged
And it makes me feel strange.
It makes me a stranger to my old friends.
It makes me a stranger to myself.
Monday, November 1, 2010
South Bay Hills (maybe complete)
There are few things I love more than to drive through South Bay hills in the early spring. You'll understand when you see it. As I sit in the back seat, I let my mind go where it wants to.
I think of hands tied and shattered walls
and blood I never saw,
how (time and) common struggle (purpose) form(s)
the tightest bonds.
And I wonder that a man can fall
and not really fail,
though I can't tell from (down) here.
But most of all I think of
a woman I want to love and how
the changes I've let happen to my heart
might keep me from her.
There are few things I dislike more than to drive through South Bay hills in the summer, not because it's so unpleasant, but I have seen them in the spring: I know what they can be, what they so recently were and will be again. Just not soon enough. You'll understand when you see it.
I think of hands tied and shattered walls
and blood I never saw,
how (time and) common struggle (purpose) form(s)
the tightest bonds.
And I wonder that a man can fall
and not really fail,
though I can't tell from (down) here.
But most of all I think of
a woman I want to love and how
the changes I've let happen to my heart
might keep me from her.
There are few things I dislike more than to drive through South Bay hills in the summer, not because it's so unpleasant, but I have seen them in the spring: I know what they can be, what they so recently were and will be again. Just not soon enough. You'll understand when you see it.
Tuesday, October 5, 2010
Split Vision
I see through two separate eyes,
one for the heart, one for the brain.
And they don't see the same,
no, not this time.
To feel the love
or steel the mind?
I don't know what I'm doing here.
Raving with the cheshire moon,
my legs both move in their own ways
and all my thoughts are blaring out of tune.
A luna loon a lieu na loo
I don't know what I'm doing here.
one for the heart, one for the brain.
And they don't see the same,
no, not this time.
To feel the love
or steel the mind?
I don't know what I'm doing here.
Raving with the cheshire moon,
my legs both move in their own ways
and all my thoughts are blaring out of tune.
A luna loon a lieu na loo
I don't know what I'm doing here.
Friday, September 17, 2010
Buds
I watch wild limbs
conduct the wind
in their song
and we all sing along.
"sheh sheh sheh sheh"
Every person is a wave,
an oscillation,
a series of semi-circles,
a year of seasons in a day, a month a decade.
What a beautiful bird
What a beautiful arrow
and what a narrow path from my hand to its heart (breast).
What full hearted (breasted) bird
What a foolhardy sparrow
(who lets itself be lured by the bread that I left)
Come on, cut through me,
turn my soul into science,
display me in diagram
and cold calculation.
It's what I do to myself.
Let's make this easy
let's just make this right.
Don't want anything to get in the way
of holding you tightly to me.
Let's not let the fires in our minds
beat out the fires in our hearts.
Let's let love burn in our souls every day.
conduct the wind
in their song
and we all sing along.
"sheh sheh sheh sheh"
Every person is a wave,
an oscillation,
a series of semi-circles,
a year of seasons in a day, a month a decade.
What a beautiful bird
What a beautiful arrow
and what a narrow path from my hand to its heart (breast).
What full hearted (breasted) bird
What a foolhardy sparrow
(who lets itself be lured by the bread that I left)
Come on, cut through me,
turn my soul into science,
display me in diagram
and cold calculation.
It's what I do to myself.
Let's make this easy
let's just make this right.
Don't want anything to get in the way
of holding you tightly to me.
Let's not let the fires in our minds
beat out the fires in our hearts.
Let's let love burn in our souls every day.
Weakness (unfinished draft)
We have weakness
so we have reason
for each other
and we hold our joy in canyons
carved away by sadness.
We have weakness
so we have reason
for each other.
I'll hold you through the night
and never let you go.
Though others may look on
and call this madness,
We know in our depths that we are right.
Come try to dry your eyes
upon my shoulder.
Your makeup stains my shirt
but I don't mind.
(This senseless mess
keeps you from any answer.)
I search for words to help you see again.
We have weakness
so we have reason
for each other.
He never learned
and you burned through it all.
......
....
.......
Test the irons
and rage against the ribbing;
Our hearts beat strong
against a steadfast will.
.....
....
.....
so we have reason
for each other
and we hold our joy in canyons
carved away by sadness.
We have weakness
so we have reason
for each other.
I'll hold you through the night
and never let you go.
Though others may look on
and call this madness,
We know in our depths that we are right.
Come try to dry your eyes
upon my shoulder.
Your makeup stains my shirt
but I don't mind.
(This senseless mess
keeps you from any answer.)
I search for words to help you see again.
We have weakness
so we have reason
for each other.
He never learned
and you burned through it all.
......
....
.......
Test the irons
and rage against the ribbing;
Our hearts beat strong
against a steadfast will.
.....
....
.....
Time and Distance
The sun sets in my West
as it rises in your East
and you should be the least of my worries.
A promise made, though not on a stone
for the time we'd spend alone,
that when I returned from here
we'd make our home.
You made a choice
(I did not press you)
that I'd be the only man
to ever undress you.
I watch the lights come in,
hear the roar that brings the wind
as I breathe in my new sin for its comfort.
You told me growing old
would never get old
so long as we were doing it together.
You let me believe
we were tied up in a dream.
You ripped apart the seam
and went on your own way.
You've made it so hard to ever feel right.
You've made it so hard to be the same
as I was before you came
back into my life
and told me that you were going to be mine (my wife)
It rises in my East
and sets in your West.
I know you won't rest until day comes.
Rises in the East
sets in the west.
I'm not giving you the rest of my days here!
You were going to be mine.
You were going to be my...
The sun sets in my West
as it rises in your East
and I'm making you the least of my worries.
as it rises in your East
and you should be the least of my worries.
A promise made, though not on a stone
for the time we'd spend alone,
that when I returned from here
we'd make our home.
You made a choice
(I did not press you)
that I'd be the only man
to ever undress you.
I watch the lights come in,
hear the roar that brings the wind
as I breathe in my new sin for its comfort.
You told me growing old
would never get old
so long as we were doing it together.
You let me believe
we were tied up in a dream.
You ripped apart the seam
and went on your own way.
You've made it so hard to ever feel right.
You've made it so hard to be the same
as I was before you came
back into my life
and told me that you were going to be mine (my wife)
It rises in my East
and sets in your West.
I know you won't rest until day comes.
Rises in the East
sets in the west.
I'm not giving you the rest of my days here!
You were going to be mine.
You were going to be my...
The sun sets in my West
as it rises in your East
and I'm making you the least of my worries.
Tuesday, August 3, 2010
Colors
I threw some color on my window
just to see what I would see
and with my fingers drew in shapes:
a scenery of trees
and a boy down on his knees
praying to god to give him answers,
his heart has got to know.
Then the light came in.
As brave as any mouse
I went up to the house
to receive my break of bread
and hear a good book read,
and see where my heart was led,
trying hard to put on chains
my mind broke from my legs.
Then the light came in.
Where do I go from here?
I can't live on a mountain top
isolated in an icy shell
insulated in the snow.
Where do I go?
Where do I go from here?
In the church there is a window
that turns light into a rainbow.
Blood that runs from my heart stains
the white world I've tried to make.
Where do I go?
Where do i go from here?
Let the light come in.
just to see what I would see
and with my fingers drew in shapes:
a scenery of trees
and a boy down on his knees
praying to god to give him answers,
his heart has got to know.
Then the light came in.
As brave as any mouse
I went up to the house
to receive my break of bread
and hear a good book read,
and see where my heart was led,
trying hard to put on chains
my mind broke from my legs.
Then the light came in.
Where do I go from here?
I can't live on a mountain top
isolated in an icy shell
insulated in the snow.
Where do I go?
Where do I go from here?
In the church there is a window
that turns light into a rainbow.
Blood that runs from my heart stains
the white world I've tried to make.
Where do I go?
Where do i go from here?
Let the light come in.
Friday, January 22, 2010
Love Song
I want to see your fields
reaching out to me,
each cross valley road
a crease of your open hand.
I need your shaded canyon woodland
with it's river and its damn
where the running water swells
to give birds room to sail.
I know that we just met
but I could not forget you
since you let me call you home.
And when my time is through
I will return to you
my home (love).
I miss all the places where
your people would meet:
your steeples and your streets,
your red brick city stores.
And I want so much more:
my whole life spent with you.
I'll watch you from my open door
and feel my seasons pass with yours.
reaching out to me,
each cross valley road
a crease of your open hand.
I need your shaded canyon woodland
with it's river and its damn
where the running water swells
to give birds room to sail.
I know that we just met
but I could not forget you
since you let me call you home.
And when my time is through
I will return to you
my home (love).
I miss all the places where
your people would meet:
your steeples and your streets,
your red brick city stores.
And I want so much more:
my whole life spent with you.
I'll watch you from my open door
and feel my seasons pass with yours.
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